Self-deception is what keeps us in some relationships. We bury our gut feelings in overthinking. We want a relationship to work so badly we ignore red flags and justify hurtful behaviors. We hope for a specific answer, so we ignore the answer we get. We keep asking for clarity because we can't accept the clarity toxic behaviors give us. We find excuses for the most apparent neglect. We hope for change, we hope to be chosen, we hope to finally be seen-so we wait, we stay, no matter how much it hurts. We forget that the answers we're looking for don't hide in a fleeting thought or a feeling, chemistry or intensity, not even in the connection we feel. Answers lay in behaviors, in the way we are treated. 自我欺骗是我们保持某些关系的原因。 我们把自己的直觉埋在过度思考中。我们非常想维持一段关系，以至于我们忽略了警示信号，并为伤害性的行为找借口。我们希望得到一个具体的答案，所以我们会忽略我们得到的答案。 我们不断要求澄清，因为我们无法接受澄清给我们带来的有毒行为。我们为最明显的行为找借口 忽视。 我们希望改变，我们希望被选中，我们希望最终被看到-所以我们等待，我们留下来，不管有多痛苦。 我们忘记了，我们寻找的答案并不隐藏在一闪而过的想法或感觉、化学或强度中，甚至不在我们感受到的联系中。 答案在于行为，在于我们被对待的方式。